Cahoona Blog

...for that other 51 weeks of the year

Thursday, July 26, 2007

Old Soldiers

TONTINEIPA pronunciation: A system of annuities in which the benefits pass to the surviving subscribers until only one is left.

The tontine is named after Lorenzo Tonti, a Neapolitan banker who started such a scheme in France in 1653, though it has been said that they were known in Italy earlier. Each subscriber paid a sum into the fund, and in return received dividends from the capital invested; as each person died his share was divided among all the others until only one was left, reaping all the benefits. In the original scheme, the capital reverted to the state when the last subscriber died, so it was really a kind of national lottery. The idea was taken up enthusiastically in France and later in Britain and the USA; it was used to fund buildings and other public works. (There are still several hotels and other buildings in Britain and the USA with the word in their names.) Later there were private schemes in which the last survivor got the capital as well. Tontines were eventually banned in Britain and the USA, because there was too much incentive for subscribers to bump each other off to increase their share of the fund, or to become the last survivor and so claim the capital. For that reason, it’s a wonderful plot device for detective story writers, who can use it as a motive for serial murder; it was the theme of The Wrong Box by Robert Louis Stevenson and his stepson Lloyd Osbourne in 1889 (made into a film in 1966). The concept survives in a limited way in France.

In one of my all time favorite M*A*S*H* episodes, from Season 8 called "Old Soldiers", Colonel Sherman Potter, is called to Tokyo & Hawkeye is left in charge. When Potter returns, he is very secretive & looking for a package in the mail. It seems that during a fierce battle during WW I, Potter & four of his friends were trapped in a french chateau. They found a case of brandy which they drank thinking they were all going to die. When the shelling stopped, there was 1 bottle left & the soldiers made a "tontine". The agreement was that they would save the last bottle until only 1 of them was still alive. Then the last remaining "old soldier" would drink the brandy in a toast to his old buddies. Years later, Potter turned out to be the last survivor of the group, and drank the toast together with his new friends at the 4077th.

We have talked as a group about this before. I bring it up again as we near another of our annual junkets. Three of us have been friends for well over forty years, the rest for over twenty five years. The idea of a tontine for our group seems like a rather appropriate step. As Goet and I have talked, we discussed the Cahoonas buying a case of some beverage and breaking out a bottle as each member of the group passes. The group enjoys that particular bottle in celebration of the life of the deceased Cahoona.

Why this discussion now? I have no reason to believe any of us are near death. In fact, it's just the opposite. What I enjoy the most about our trip each year is that I share it with a group of guys who seem so full of life and who enjoy life so much that it inspires me to live each day more fully.

The act of entering into the tontine cements our friendships. No matter what happens over the next 20, 25, 30 or 40+ years, we will have pledged to gather as a group when one of us passes. Knowing this group, I also see many jokes over that same time about this rite.

With those thoughts in mind, I float these thoughts for your consideration:

What do we buy? Wine? Cognac? Whiskey? Vodka? Cigars? It should be something that everyone enjoys. It shouldn't be work to imbibe at the designated time(s). It should be something that ages well. Hopefully, it will be 35+ years before we crack the first one.

When do we buy? Do we wait 10 years before we purchase or is it something we buy in the next couple of years? How much do we spend? Should it be an expensive item? Do we start collecting $10-15 from each member each year until we have what we want? Do we just hit everyone for an amount when it comes time to buy?

Where is it stored? Are there establishments that would store this for us? Is this a reason to wait to purchase something?

There are probably some considerations other than these but this should provoke some thought and discussion. Perhaps we want to just bag it and save our money for beer. If so, at least we've considered this.

Cheers!


3 Comments:

At 1:13 PM, Blogger sundevilboy said...

That Mash episode is one of my favorites (right up there with "Adam's Rib"). Nonetheless, the time to make a decision could be this year when we determine what type of beverage could be purchased and how many. I suggest that a business such as Harry K or Goat's lawfirm would be the appropriate depository for the stash. I think that burbon would get high votes. Cigars would be too hard to preserve. Wine, too little for 8-10 people. Big ass bottle of Maker's Mark, Bookers, or something similar. I believe that they'll age well. Good idea. I hope your "health" prognosis is correct because, by the grace of God, there was a very experienced brain doctor in the ER when I went down. If it wasn't for him, one of those "old Solders" would already be dry. Then again, I've had Last Rights twice now, so get a contingency plan of 10 bottles of Old Grandad just in case. RIP

 
At 8:28 PM, Blogger Grappler said...

Perhaps as to what we buy, maybe we should consider, rather than a case of only one option, we each make a selection unique to that Cahoona. For example: a fine Irish whiskey for Goat, a great wine by Casey, an aged port for Turk, Kentucky Bourbon for Ksox, baby formula for Kirbo, etc.

I would personally choose to toast each of you with your personal choice of beverage, knowing it was your favorite.

 
At 11:51 AM, Blogger sundevilboy said...

"Irish Whiskey for Goat"? Despite Goat's fondness for the Irish, he's about as German as your mother's bedroom SS boots. Then again, if we're talking about what we love rather than reflective of our heritage, then I believe that a warm can of Blatz followed with a shot of "Blowjob" might be more to your liking.

Despite Grap's endless humorless immitations of Korth, I believe that he may be on to something. Put me down for a bottle of Tullamore Dew Irish Whiskey.

 

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